Sunday, December 30, 2012

Will the Real Men please stand up?

Even as I write this, there are thousands like me and you who are out there on the streets of New Delhi, Kolkata, Bengaluru, Simla, Mumbai, Patna and various other states in India for they are angered. Nirbhaya or Damini or whatever name you want to call her with, the girl who was brutally gang raped in Delhi in a moving bus last week finally succumbed to her grave injuries today. Her death has instilled a fear in each one of us that we could be the next.

Even as her death is deeply troubling, so are some other issues that have happened since the incident.

I wrote about the gang rape just after it happened, and the article and my subsequent post on FB saw a lot of men taking offence.

They said I was attacking their gender.

Why didn't I write about the cases where women harass men and even kill them?

That women are misusing dowry laws to take advantage of men.

A virtual reader Partha goes on to say that "Whatever has happened in Delhi is barbaric (if true and no media exaggeration)".
Partha also says that "on one hand women always object to objectification and on the other hand they want to look sexy and wear all those revealing clothes to show off how independent they are. If men look at them or call them sexy that becomes harassment for them. If men do not look at them, those become impotent."

I was quite mortified after hearing Abhijeet Mukherjee's comments on young women whom he called hypocrites because they held candle light marches in the day and wore make up and went to discos at night. He also called the women "dented and painted". A few hours (and possibly a kick in the ass) later, an apology was issued by the President's son and the way he said "I want to withdraw my statement. It was not meant to hurt anyone's sentiment" clearly showed how it was just a cover up and he was completely unapologetic about it. But it did give us a fair amount of idea what kind of minds are ruling our country. But then, we have known that for a pretty long time. We are not new to moral diktats from the police or the govt. like "she invited rape by dressing in a certain way", or "by being out of the house after 9 P.M." and so on and so forth.

But what really churned my gut was when some fellow virtual people started attacking me for my blatant article which said that “anatomically having b***s doesn't make you a real man. If you are a real man, learn to protect and respect your women. Otherwise you are just another animal. One that needs to be herded and chained and invariably killed one day.”

I still stand by it. And I also want to address the above questions one by one.

Attack on a gender: 

Now, I am really confused here. Are women raped by women? No. Raped by men? Yes. Who am I targeting here? Men. Isn't LHS = RHS? What gender am I attacking? I am just stating the facts.

It’s quite sad that because of a large population of indecent, lewd, uncultured men, a whole gender is being targeted here. BUT. If you are a real man, I expect you to understand that. I didn't expect some of you to have such shallow egos that got hurt at the mere mention of rape. Did you ever think about countless women who have to experience something as horrendous, then face police and system apathy and get on with their lives?

YOU come out of your cozy bedrooms and get real.

2) Why didn't I read write about the cases where women have harassed women? 

Tell me, if your house was on fire, would you call up the fire extinguisher first or get your faulty plumbing fixed first?

The point I am driving at is the country and it's women are facing an unprecedented number of sexual exploitation cases in the form of molestation rapes, gang rapes and forced prostitution. In this regard, a lot of laws have been made and maybe a handful of women misused them for their own benefit. But does that take it away from the real issue its brutality? Don't you realize the gravity of the situation, if gangrapes start happening in the heart of the city, inside public transport ? What is the working class women supposed to do? Sit at home, to defend her honor? Not venture out of the house at all?

I did say in my article that we need the strictest punishment for the culprits. So what's wrong with it? I still demand it and I stand by it!

And we HAVE to address and fix this issue; before we go on to amend the existing laws at a human level and not on a gender bias.

3) Mr.Partha or whoever you are:
You don't quite believe in all the cases of women harassment that media has reported because you think that they are possibly dented and painted too like the women of this country.

You seem to be a spurned lover whose advances got a sharp reaction from a girl. Let me tell you something. The way you have the right to look at a girl (to admire or to scorn at her), the same way, the girl has an equal right to either allow your advances or put an end to it. Be man enough. Learn to take it in your stride.

If your ego is the size of a dinosaur, it’s better to turn to men who will understand your signals better. May be you will never have to "prove" your (im)potency to anyone, ever again.

People like these guys have no right to tell us women what we do/don't do right! Even if a women walks naked on the street, NO man has to right to force himself on her. We live in a civilized society, not in a jungle, where you pounce on anything that looks like a prey.

I don't know if capital punishment is a deterrent, or chemical castration is, or efficient policing and fast track courts et al. What I do know for sure is that if all the men around us pledge to protect us, to see us as equals and not as objects of sexual gratification, this country will be a far better place to live in. Where no mother will ever have to loose a bright and brave girl like Nirbhaya at the hands of drunk and perverted men. 

130 comments:

  1. Hi Ghata,

    You've raised some valid questions. I think it is foolish to go on press and say such illogical statements, especially when the people are already enraged. It only adds fuel to fire. Yes, it doesn't look like the equation is getting balanced right now. LHS not equal to RHS.
    Good post Ghata, keep it up. This should not die down with time.

    Regards

    Jay
    My Blog | My FB Page

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Jay for your support. Seeing the comments below, not too men seem to be happy about it

      Delete
    2. Congrats for creating your own grave!!. Now enjoy your death and that of your son.

      Understand how you have dug up your own grave here -

      http://parthasadhukhan.wordpress.com/2012/12/25/how-delhi-gang-rape-will-change-our-life-in-future/

      Delete
  2. Valid points. In supportive agreement. Best wishes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't be surprised if tomorrow you are termed a criminal for no offence committed by you. You will be responsible for that day. Now with the amendments sought in different laws, all men are vulnerable, and people like you are dug up their own grave.

      Delete
  3. Loved each and every word. You gave words to the thoughts in every women's mind today. Not just wishes but today from me- RESPECT !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks a lot Farina for your kind words :)

      Delete
  4. I can understand . To inculcate respect in few people's minds I don't know how many more posts r needed. I wonder if these ppl will react the same way if it happens to their loved ones and coming to raising the voice against so and so crime so severely why can't they raise the voice if they so strongly feel about it ? Rather than attacking on a mere fb post which police , court or CM won't read , why don't they go on streets, fight, file petitions

    I don't know ghata. Am more sad by this mind set . It's sick ..it's shocking . I can't point one Place to be safest but most of my delhi exp were scary !and am damn sure thAt many here don't tolerate a progressing women who had an equal qualification or an increased financial stature !

    Sleepless from many days after that news . One must read the letter her bro wrote to Indian express a week . Would they have dreamt in the worst of dreams that their life will take such a sharp turn !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Quite true Afshan. Its scary and sick and shocking.
      A lot more than few posts are needed to change mindset of people. Lets join our hands together to do that. Don't loose hope just yet!

      Delete
  5. Very powerful. I am certain with the kind of awareness that this event and the subsequent dialog in the social space that people like you are initiating will ensure that this tragic sacrifice will not be in vain.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am trying to do my bit. Thanks for your wishes Subhorp :)

      Delete
    2. Congrats for creating your own grave!!. Now enjoy your death and that of your son.

      Understand how you have dug up your own grave here -

      http://parthasadhukhan.wordpress.com/2012/12/25/how-delhi-gang-rape-will-change-our-life-in-future/

      Delete
  6. Better issue notification to all men leave this country as they are going to hang men as per their will and tolerate all absurd logic, women do not do crime , so law should be one sided, why one have guts to ask those, if women do not do crime like rape etc, why they afraid to accept the same as gender neutral law? If women do not do rape, they will not be punished, but on why women should be exempted to do crime like rape men and there should not be any punishment? Earlier in 498a the word relative misused left, right and center and the word gange will be misused left right and center and any one can be termed as rapist including you also.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have no idea which side of the planet you reside in. I never said there should not be a gender neutral law. I never said women who rape or misuse dowry or rape laws should not be punished. You seem to be reading the article from a mind of your own, chalking out your own conclusions without any consideration for the written word.

      Delete
  7. Dear madam .. Respect earned, it can't be get by force or putting gun on head and making law hang to deatch etc. First learn to accept the gender netural law and polciey. The same day a man was cut in 11pics, next two day another men was cut in 17 pics, women like you think the same acceptable and promote and save gurd such women who do such crime, please there will be massive backlash. Please stop the fantasy of how to kill men and term every one rapist as per your will and wish.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Rightly said Swarup.....Its shocking to see there is NOT a single protest against the brutal act of men being chopped into 11 peices....How can people simply accept such an act and promote misandry ?
      Wake up Indians...promote Gender Neutrality.

      Delete
    2. Agreed Swarup,gender bias of media and goverment is pointed out by following points:-

      Gender biased laws
      Similar atrocities on men being played down by media and men being looked down as weak when they are the real victims.

      Its all the feminist organizations trying to undermine the fact that men too are victime at women's hand.

      REgards
      kamal

      Delete
    3. Hi Swarup,

      Totally agreed with your points. Laws should not be gender biased otherwise society is going to suffer more by it's misuse. There is no logic that women can't do crime such as rape, murder...

      Br
      Kumar

      Delete
    4. @zodiac: Why do you want others to protest against women? Why don't you lead this protest. It's very easy to point a finger at others.

      Delete
    5. @AnonymouIf you really want to bring a change in the laws, work for it. Atleast be courageous enough to come out and not hide behind the "anonymous" tag. Otherwise you will always be just that!

      Delete
    6. @jee java: Atleast I never said what you are insinuating that I did.

      Delete
    7. The same day one 62 year grandma had conceses sex with a courier man in Mumbai and later alledge rape. Police arrest the innocent man and later found it the grandma framed him fearing her children will find it. Why there is no punishment for this grandma. if rape is heines crime false rape is more severe. She should be punished for life long imprisonment.
      Also same day one deaf women alledge rape against 2 man and got arrest them. Finally she accept she fabricated the case becase she was with her boy friend for 4 hours and she afraid she will be scold by her father for not study. What about that 2 inocent man. This deaf women also put behind the bar life long or sentenced to death for ruining the life of 2 innocent man. 70% of rapes are false just take revenge against man. This is confirmed by all the reserch and also various police officials. Most of the cases girl friend accuse boyfriend for rape because he refuse to marry her. Why there is no law against girls who refuse to marry boy friends after indulging sexual relationship. 70% of the times girl friend ditch her boyfriend when she find out a rich and better catch. All the laws are biased and loaded against man. Man have only one option take law in land and fight for his justice.

      Delete
  8. Another complete biased blog entry. Ghata or whoever you are, instead of creating enimity by writing such provocative entries and mentioning 1000 times - ' I still demand it and I stand by it!'.....try to demand for 'GENDER NEUTRAL LAWS'/ Wonder why you are always so sheepish when it comes to neutral laws/ neutral outlook/neutral mindset of people ?? Are you afraid that if people become neutral you will lose support of all the Misandry from men/women alike ??
    WAKE UP and promote the TRUTH.
    Truth is :
    1) Rape cases are 74% false.
    2) 498A cases are 95% false, with less that 80% conviction.
    And these stats are NOT out of sentiments, but provided by govt of India.

    Refer http://zodiac498.blogspot.in/2012/10/misuse-of-dv498a-myth-or-reality.html

    I hope going forward you will stop crying and rather promote gentral neutrality.

    None of you overrated insensitive blogs talks about the amount of punishment that needs to be metted out of the woman who files a false r@pe case.....I wonder why.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hi Ghata Ji,
    1)
    The way women don't rape Women, same way men don't rape men.
    The way LHS=RHS, same way RHS=LHS.
    Women also do rape, sexual assualts, adultry and domestic violence but they get away from all these as no law under IPC says women can be convicted under these sections.
    He never said that those men should be punished but he definitely said that all criminals (be it man or a woman) should be punished so make gender neutral laws. . Can you please clarify that what wrong in this demand? I read one of your comment where you said all Men are potential rapists so do you feel the same about your father, husband and brother. Please clarify.

    2) In most of your blogs you talked about EGO and called men (who were trying to put their point) illetrate and called them illogical. For your information, Partha is an IIT graduate and you are some arbit college graduate so please don't even try to compare the logical aptitude. You better know what I mean :-)

    3) Please re-read all the stats below and before writing any blog, I CHALLENGE you to reply what should be done to avoid such mis-use of law. I asume before you are a girl, you are human.
    =================================================================
    1. NCRB reports that every year 62000 married commit suicide in india as compared 30000 married women.
    2. Every year 100000 lakh false dowry cases are being filed, just out of anger, out of which 98% finally turn out to be false. Search 498a and legal terrorism in GOOGLE.
    3. Read it:
    Warning Document for Indian Bachelors
    =====================================

    http://www.scribd.com/doc/106788620/Warning-for-Indian-Bachelors

    Death Trap by Indian women
    ==========================

    http://sffdelhitrainingsessions.blogspot.in/2012/12/AREyouMALE.html


    4) There is a restriction of 4096 characters thus I cannot put more facts so can you please remove that restriction?

    ReplyDelete
  10. I think Ghata is scared of gender neutral laws. If she is not a rapist or doing adultry then I don't understand that why is she so against gender neutral laws?

    ghata ji, why are you so scared? Have you done rape, adultry, domestic violence?? then why opposing gender-neutral law demand? daal main kuch kala hai :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You know "whoever you are", by writing such comments, you are not demeaning me, but showing where you come from and what mindset you carry!

      Delete
  11. @afshan
    I request you to please go out of your house.
    Looking at your fear, I suspect that you will falsely implicate some innocent men for rape attempt.
    All men, beware!!! please stay away from Afshan or any such women. They can screw you just by oral allegation. Read below:

    http://sffdelhitrainingsessions.blogspot.in/2012/12/AREyouMALE.html

    ReplyDelete
  12. Everybody please read:

    http://zodiac498.blogspot.in/2012/10/misuse-of-dv498a-myth-or-reality.html

    and stay away from such girls (ghata and Afshan) as with this mentality, they can falsely implicate you in any gender biased case.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good joke "whoever you are" !!!We ll say who stays away from whom.

      Delete
  13. Ghata stop being a feminist bitch please...rape is a crime that deserves the worse punishment...however laws need to be gender neutral.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. OMG really? You think so? Why don't you ask for them rather than cribbing at my doorstep? #B******

      Delete
    2. Ghata,
      Nobody is coming at your doorstep but you just invited comments from others (read last line of this post) Moreover you did a personal attack on Partha but changing blog assuming you won't be caught. No B*t*hy-talks please, can I request? It rather appears that you are going to doorsteps of men and asking them to attack.
      Calling a man illetrate (and that too a IIT grad) and B****** is what your reality is. Can you introduce yourself? I request you to please mantain decorum and don't loose temper if you are not able to support your (il)logic.
      Hey guys,
      Please stay away. Don't throw mud on a p*g as it will rather enjoy.

      Delete
  14. A law should not be gender based. I thought every one wants equality. Then why are gender-biased laws created. Whoever does a crime, should get the same punishment.

    A man does a crime, and laws are made to target men. When a woman does a crime, why are laws not made to target women. And I don't think any one here will deny, that man and woman both do crimes.
    So, instead of making laws for man or woman, laws should be made for human beings. Every one should be treated equally and protected by the law of the country.

    A girl filing a false rape case should be given the same punishment as the man who actually did this heinous crime.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Agree. Never said/insinuated otherwise !

      Delete
    2. Well said dude!
      These girls will understand only when their husbands/brother/father will be trapped for false case (rape/498a/DV) till then they will keep support misandry. I wish that day comes soon.

      Delete
  15. Laws should not be gender biased otherwise society is going to suffer more by it's misuse. There is no logic that women can't do crime such as rape, murder...

    Br
    Kumar

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nobody said so. Atleast I never did. It's all a figment of your overworked imagination!

      Delete
    2. Ghata, are you feeling ashamed of your past comments about men? better accept it if you have done that !

      Delete
  16. Hey don't use abusive word to show your anger but she definitely can. She can file a case of mental cruelty on you for calling her by name. yes, you got it right !! Domestic violence act says that calling wife by her name is also domestic violence.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahaha......you think 'Name Calling' mentioned in DVA is calling her by name???? LOL...I can't laugh more....it is reference to abuses my freind..it is a legal term..

      Delete
  17. How many of here know this ?
    Congress welcomes SC order to dismiss alleged case of rape against Rahul Gandhi

    http://www.newstrackindia.com/newsdetails/2012/10/18/252-Congress-welcomes-SC-order-to-dismiss-alleged-case-of-rape-against-Rahul-Gandhi.html

    The Supreme Court earlier today dismissed a case against Rahul Gandhi, saying 'the allegation is without substance and without an iota of evidence'.
    The apex court, which fined former Samajwadi Party MLA Kishore Samrite Rs. five lakhs, said that Gandhi's reputation and that of his family had been damaged by the lawsuit.

    More details at :
    http://swarup1972.blogspot.in/2012/11/supreme-court-quashes-rape-charges.html
    Supreme Court quashes rape charges against filmmaker Madhur Bhandarkar

    No punishment for Ms. Preeti Jain, for wasting 9 years of government and court resources.. why?

    ( Link of IBN News)

    If Sc want to stop such false/fabricated case, must punish such women, as she is not a "small child" or "abala Nari"!!

    Same type of allegation against Mr. Rahull Gandhi, SC fined 10 Lacks to the petitioner, why she got Scot free for wasting court and other resources 9 years?

    Need the amend in rape law , as mutual physical relation can't be termed as rape if one of partner find after wards the relationship does not work out, a lot of women also end the realtiohsip , does that to be termed as Rape?

    So, Mr.Jhon Abrham also can file a Rape case against Ms. Bipasha Basu, as she had not married and end the relationship?


    Any small child also will say , it is not rape, but our Great Law makers failed to understand the same, result today we witness every day the cry for Rape is increasing by misuse the loophole in the Rape law the physical relation was under consent or without consent.

    ReplyDelete
  18. The mindset here is deeply misogynistic.

    I would like to tell Partha this:

    Yes, Dowry laws may be misused by a few women, but how about questioning the root of it all? --- WHY ARE DOWRY LAWS NEEDED? They are needed because of the deplorable position of women in this country. Some people may indeed misuse them, the human race has its good and bad elements. Nevertheless, the greater good has to be considered, therefore dowry laws are NEEDED here because (most unfortunately) the plight of Indian women is much worse than that of Indian men.

    A man has no right to harass a woman even if she is walking naked on the street at 3 a.m. ... THAT, my friend, is the difference between being a civilized human -- as opposed to a barbaric brute who acts on animal instinct.

    Well expressed, Ghata. Let's not forget that there are wonderful men in our country too, who stand equally disgusted by the misdeeds of criminal chauvinists.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @Ash-Firstly its not "may be".This is a hard fact that women do misuse laws to get undue advantages.Rape/dowry/DV you name any law and you will find thousands of women abusers. BTW are you saying walking nude in the 3 AM is civilized act?

      Delete
    2. ///WHY ARE DOWRY LAWS NEEDED? ////
      ~~~~~~~

      After a few thousand men innocent men have been castrated chemically and incarcerated for decades we will be having the same jolly good debate on "tut.." ..."tut" ...."...minor miscarriage of justice ..." and why was castration needed ???? it all because some one had a ........ !

      Delete
    3. The best way to tackle Dowry related issue is - Girl's family should insist on 'No Dowry' & Simplest of Marriage ceremonies, pref. in a temple, without any of the hype, extravagance or show associated with most Indian marriages, nowadays.
      By refusing to give dowry, you can be the most effective cure for dowry evils, in a sort of 'No head, no headache' way.
      Mr.N.Murthy's daughter also had a simple marriage, despite having all that wealth.

      BUT, 'No dowry demanded or taken' is an indicator of the simple/ naive nature of the groom/family & hence he is almost, surely going to be trapped in false dowry cases, like it happened to us.
      That's the real situation nowadays.
      Dr.Nick

      Delete
    4. Thank you Ash for your support and pointing out some real issues.

      Delete
    5. Thank you Dr. Nick for some very valid points there.

      Delete
    6. hahaha...dowry laws misused by 'SOME' women? You r a fool. 98% women misuse it. Lawyers file such cases for money.

      You said a man has no right to harass woman if she is walking naked at 3 am...hahah what do you think will be social reaction is a man do that? He will be arrested or stoned...do you think it is a good sign?

      Delete
    7. Since you've raised the point of social reaction. If the social reaction to a man walking nude at 3 PM is to be arrested or stoned, all we ask is that the social reaction to a women walking nude at 3 PM also be the same - arrested or stoned. Arrest would be the legal way to do it - man or woman. Stoning would be barbaric - but if that's what it is for a man, then so be it for a woman. Gender neutral laws right? Both he and she shouldn't get raped. As simple as that.

      Delete
  19. May be the way Partha said could have been said differently but the point he was making is completely true.. even the media which covered this case round the clock didn't cover the the other case where a man was cut into 17 pieces by two women?? why? and you women don't even talk about it..and where is it in Indian culture to wear revealing clothes.. even if women are nude it doesn't give anyone the right to rape them.. but then please stop talking about culture..women have mastered the art of weeping over the ages.. you people cry equality.. but young women can't even stand in a bus for 20 mins and give seat to a old man/woman.. it is women who push women into prostitution.. do you know that.. there are sick people who look like men.. but man despite being stronger is nice to women.. and most women don't have the grace to accept it.. give men their due..and don't make this rape case as one of a gender issue.. it is not a case of gender issue.. but one of a serious crime where cops didn't do their job as in many other cases.. if you really want to fight for a better system then support Lokpal bill demanded by Kejriwal, and fight for a gender neutral society.. support men against the harassment of men by women/wives... you might dispute it.. but if the conviction rate is around 2% in syuch cases that speaks volumes about the genuineness of the cases..

    And for someone talking about dowry laws.. instead go and fight for property right's law at home instead of grabbing husband's hard earned money.. that amounts to the oldest prpofession..

    Murali

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When you are asking me to be gender neutral, atleast you shouldn't be doing the same. Trying to prove your point by pointing a finger at all women.

      And who's stopping you from fighting for gender neutral laws? Atleast I never opposed it.

      Delete
  20. /////“anatomically having b***s doesn't make you a real man. If you are a real man, learn to protect and respect your women. ////

    Fantastic trap men have been lead into over the last 20 .. 30 years

    A protected generation of women like my grand mother's did NOT seek equal rights. They knew they did NOT go to war, they did NOT put out fires, they knew they were protected but agreed to their place in society

    An equal right seeking generation [like the current one] , which is happy seeking exorbitant alimony and happy filing DV at the drop of a hat should learn to protect itself !!!! [ equal responsibilities]

    Why blame women when men are falling over one another to castrate other men ??


    Vinayak
    http://Vinayak.wordpress.com
    http://fromvinayak.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't even want to give my opinion to your archaic thoughts! Please do me a favor by not visiting my blog or posting any comments here. EVER! Thank you very much

      Delete
    2. // Why blame women when men are falling over one another to castrate other men ?? //

      Very rightly put Vinayak... !!
      Those men will only get enlightened and understand the absurdity of this when they or one of their near-dear ones get falsely implicated and castrated and they will have nowhere to go and even abandoned by their male friends, still far from enlightenment!!

      Why some enlightened people don't believe initial media report is because media has only one mindset -- That women can be ONLY Victims!

      live example of False Rape case:
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5jrkV9QfQbc
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5kbjkRmhQM

      live example of False molestation case -- (the REAL women ??):
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XCb_PPbMCc

      world-wide false rape cases:
      falserapesociety.blogspot.com

      Delete
    3. Ghata, Can you please make your blog private or put filter to accept comments only from women?

      Delete
    4. Now even SC has ridiculed the juvenile protection law saying juveniles are doing sa many heinious crimes that they need to be punished severely. Only woomen will continue to need protection. I am wondering when they will grow up..

      Delete
  21. Please clarify, on the point Women harassing women, and the analogy of looking for a fire extinguisher in case of a house on fire rather than checking the plumbing. I am unable to understand what you intended to communicate. Is harassing to be considered as fire or men considered as fire and woman the house? Again, what kind of fire extinguisher are you talking about? The laws are very much there, speedy enforcement is what is lacking. Coming to the point of Real man, there is no such thing a real man, first all the perons are human beings as a classification, homosapiens. Everyone needs protection, not a man or a woman but a human being. All the more so because the gender differences are hyped up and both the genders encouraged to belittle the other, especially in today's day and age. This cas be seen in our day to day life since comparisons are made based on gender, people riduculed based on gender. Further, if a male is unable to perform what is defined as a masculine task, he is told to wear bangles, at the same time a female who is able to compete what is considered the domain of males is considered as masculine (typically identified as the one wearing the pants or having the b***s as the author of the blog put it. I would only suggest that all the people fight against this classification based on gender and then move forward. Once we all understand that we are not much different from each other, we would be able to co-exist well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Point taken Shankar. But my intent was never what you are trying to insinuate here.

      Delete
  22. It is immensely disturbing to see men react so irrationally. She does not mean EVERY man is a potential rapist. Why can't everyone interpret it this way? A lot of social injustice has been happening in our wrecked country and it's high time we take up responsibility. It's cowardly to say, " Oh it's not my fault. I'm a decent man." The rapist is a man like you and me. The biggest lesson can start with from this blog - Respect everyone and their words.
    We as men should learn from these words. This a cry - don't interpret it word by word. Instead, get the over all idea and start changing. Men in India needs to change their attitude towards woman. Period.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Men in India needs to change their attitude towards woman. Period., really?

      Do you know all the spastics of other country, where you fell they respect women and Indian men do not respect women? The day women learn to respect another women, forget about men, 90% of crime from the society will be vanish, that is hard reality, go back to all war and terrorist organizations formation.

      History witness let start from Mahabharata to any terrorist organizations or political agitations, they had always used the women abuse as excuses to create war and kill innocent men, although there is enough examples the criminal activity is not a gender specific issue. Would we also want to do the same once again? Please think for a moment!!!

      Today we are in 21st centruty we are still suffering the same mind set , result making more and more biased and one sided law which destroy the basic foundation of family and institution of marriage, which was the most deterrent to reduce the crime.

      Any way the fantasy of some male hater organizations to kill the men as whole sale free license is going to get fulfilled very soon as allover the world the statistics shows the capital punishment used only against poor and socially down people and India is not different , just have the look for all capital punishments Judgements for reference.

      Those term Delhi as rape capital must know:
      http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/cri_rap-crime-rapes

      DEFINITION: Number of sexual assaults recorded by police in that country per 100,000 population.

      India 1.7 per 100000 population.
      http://www.causes.com/causes/7710-stop-abuse-of-all-women-and-children/actions/52809

      Somewhere in America, a woman is raped every 2 minutes, according to the U.S. Department of Justice.
      In 1995, 354,670 women were the victims of a rape or sexual assault. (NationalCrime Victimization Survey. Bureau of Justice Statistics, U.S. Department of Justice, 1996.)
      The FBI estimates that 72 of every 100,000 females in the United States wereraped last year. (Federal Bureau of Investigation, Uniform Crime Statistics, 1996.)

      http://muslimrapewave.wordpress.com/2012/04/18/sweden-has-the-highest-rape-statistics-in-europe-i-wonder-why/
      Sweden, 46 incidents of rape are reported per 100,000 residents. This figure is double as many as in the UK which reports 23 cases, and four times that of the other Nordic countries, Germany and France. The figure is up to 20 times the figure for certain countries in southern and eastern Europe……Over 5,000 rapes are reported in Sweden per annum while reports in other countries of a comparable size amounted to only a few hundred.”

      As per crime bure report about 70% found not guilty and more than 90% are mutual physical relation converted to r@pe cases. Please note to convect any person in rape cases, today there is no need of even medical reports or eye witness, her own statements is sufficient, means in those cases it is a accused proved himself innocent.

      When police can't catch the real r@pist , send every tom,dick or harry as rapist in false and fabricated cases which is the main reason for less convection.

      Delete
    2. @Nevin
      While following Ghata on FB I found she even said that these kind of comments actually make me believe that ALL men can be potential rapists. It's just about opportunity. Right now, I am just thanking my God that the men in my life are with me on this. About the rest, We ll just have to be careful!

      So what you have to say about this?
      This girl very smartly using this rape case, dividing society male and female rather than innocent and crimnals.
      She does no seem to be normal to me as everytime a gender neutral society is demanded she can be seen crying on it.
      If she has not done adultry, extra-marital affairs, domestic violence, rape then why she is so worried and against of gender-neutral laws.
      All these men are just saying that a law should take criminal into account not a gender.
      Shame on you Ghata !!

      Delete
    3. Thank you Nevin for being the only understanding and considerate male around here. :)

      Delete
    4. Males are always considerate for needs of feminism but I have never seen a female shouing for a male's right!

      Delete
  23. Now why the law should be gender netural and wahy maximum country the same is gender netural in the name of sexual assult : reference is below, do not think all women are good and they do not do sexual asult.
    JAIPUR: A 16-year old girl was raped by the paramour of her mother in Chomu area in Jaipur district. The police were shocked to find that the minor was raped with the consent of her mother. On the basis of the victim's complaint, police arrested the man and her mother on Sunday.

    http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/jaipur/Minor-raped-with-mothers-consent-2-held/articleshow/17826106.cms

    Media, women's organizations, feminists, politicians will keep their mouth shut when these incidents happen because the crime has been committed by a woman.
    Another news :
    Full news : Huma Khan sentenced to 3 years jail for torturing minor girl: Why Electronic media is silent?

    Huma Khan, a 47-year-old actress who had appeared in a string of C grade films during the late 80s and early 90s, has been charged for kidnapping and criminal intimidation and sentenced to three years of rigorous imprisonment by Additional Sessions Court Judge AR Waghwate.
    http://articles.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/2012-12-22/news-interviews/35969203_1_huma-khan-medical-reports-minor-girl
    Criminal does not have any gender, religion or caste.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Now why the law should be gender neutral and why maximum country the same is gender neutral in the name of sexual assault : reference is below, do not think all women are good and they do not do sexual assault.

    JAIPUR: A 16-year old girl was raped by the paramour of her mother in Chomu area in Jaipur district. The police were shocked to find that the minor was raped with the consent of her mother. On the basis of the victim’s complaint, police arrested the man and her mother on Sunday.

    http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/jaipur/Minor-raped-with-mothers-consent-2-held/articleshow/17826106.cms

    Media, women’s organizations, feminists, politicians will keep their mouth shut when these incidents happen because the crime has been committed by a woman.
    Another news :
    Full news : Huma Khan sentenced to 3 years jail for torturing minor girl: Why Electronic media is silent?

    Huma Khan, a 47-year-old actress who had appeared in a string of C grade films during the late 80s and early 90s, has been charged for kidnapping and criminal intimidation and sentenced to three years of rigorous imprisonment by Additional Sessions Court Judge AR Waghwate.

    http://articles.timesofindia.indiatimes.com/2012-12-22/news-interviews/35969203_1_huma-khan-medical-reports-minor-girl
    Criminal does not have any gender, religion or caste.

    For more details visit :
    http://swarup1972.blogspot.in/2012/12/huma-khan-sentenced-to-3-years-jail-for.html
    Caution : If any Law or policy made without keeping in mind the history of mistakes and possibility of misuses clause , with the assumption that all women born in Raja Harish chandra family ( never lie) and all men born in criminal family , will lead to a disharmony in society and net results will be the “INCREASE IN CRIME IN SOCIETY”.

    Choice to you to support a gender neutral balanced law by which both men or women can lead a dignified life or refuse to accept that women can also do the heinous crime and make one sided biased law to fulfill the long fantasy of Indian male haters organizations , how to kill men legally and the same should not be termed as crime.

    Can you write some think about such incidence? I can give you enough examples, where maximum women are in forced Falsh trade ( every day raped) are pushed by their mothers and their father is no more alive!!!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Hello Ladies & all Readers,
    We already have innumerous special provisions for protection & over-protection of women at every place, which are being, over-whelmingly misused to trap / terrorize husbands & their family members ( which, btw, includes 2 – 5 women ) in false cases, for extortion, divorces & vengeance for hurt egos, in effect, hurting 2 – 5 women, in name of providing protection to one wife/woman.
    By making them gender-neutral, you will not be diluting those laws for women, but will mercifully, permit men/ husbands, to come under the category of ‘Human-Beings’ & ‘Capable of being Innocent’.
    We also welcome fixing Time-limits / minimum adjournments ( not more than 2 – 3 adjournments / excused dates ).
    We pray for the Speediest of Trials, for all matrimonial / sexual harassment / all Criminal cases, starting at lower Courts, to expose the truths behind all such cases.
    We root ( & we wish that, you all have the guts / heart, to publicly announce the same ) for the strictest punishments to the guilty ( whosoever maybe) & for those who misused / falsified allegations / such provisions, for personal / blackmailing / extortion gains.
    But tell me,…..
    Where / how do such husbands, ring the bell, for their grievances ?
    Where do their family-women-folk, shout / announce / give dharna etc., for their innocence / protest against their abuse &/or ask for punishment for their abusers ?
    Lets be honest, Can such women-relatives of husband, ever come/ do they come, under classification of Indian WOMEN / needy / abla nari / bechari / innocent women ?
    OR
    Do they come / remain under the Default – ‘Criminals’ Class ( as for men ) for the crime, that they are related to that default Criminal – Husband / Man.
    And please do not forget that these faulty laws & their 98% misuse, will come back to haunt those very-same misusers / beneficiaries, as u also can be trapped by virtue of your being related to brothers, fathers, cousins, sons, etc.
    On that day, please don’t do a ‘volte face’ or a ‘Oops’, because by then you will not be in a position to rectify / turn back the tsunami of pseudo-feminism / damages done.
    It’s better to be honest, balanced & thoughtful, from now on.
    Pl. Pray for Truth to prevail & to become the norm, rather than the exception that it is, in today’s society & help ‘Save this Society’.
    &
    Please have a live & kicking Conscience in your mind, along with a Heart, for all people rather than, just for females.
    Thanks,
    Sincerely,
    Dr.Nick

    ReplyDelete
  26. Hi Ghata,
    I have read your previous post and this one as well. Its really stirring and completely true. I am completely shocked to see the responses from people which took your remarks ON THEM. This simply shows that the mindsets of this society will not change because they do not want to understand or listen. Somebody is even saying here that 70% of the rape cases are not true. I want to tell that person that 90% of the rape cases are not even registered coz of the fear of not being accepted by the society and also coz of no justice given.I heard similar remarks from some females (aunties of my area) who were saying that the girl(the gangrape victim) invited rape by going out late and that too with her BOYFRIEND.Feel ashamed to be a part of such a hypocrit society.I really like the way you are answering all these people. My good wishes are with you. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Gunjan for your support. I am trying my best :)

      Delete
    2. Hmm...so that cases registered says it all. This only says that all those false cases are yet to come...I will not be surprised tomorrow if the conviction rate in rape increases tomorrow with changing provisions...don't be surprised if any of your near and dear ones is caught in this law and end up paying huge money for doing nothing

      Delete
  27. Hi Gunjan
    What you are saying is absoltely true but a pain of an innocent men being trapped in false rape case is almost equal to of raped women. He also got killed mentally as well as socially.
    Currently in rage people are blindly forcing to register every rape case blindly (without any basic investigation) and complete the case in a week time.
    So many men have lost jobs due to such false rape cases and false arrests making their dependent families to suffer. So many men have committed suicide due to this stigma.
    People above are just demanding that every case should be registered after atleat a minimal invistigation and even accused should be given a chance to speak.
    I request you to please visit my blog and reply there. Thanks !

    http://misuseof498aanddv.blogspot.in/2012/12/misuse-of-dv498a-myth-or-reality.html#!/2012/12/misuse-of-dv498a-myth-or-reality.html

    http://deathtrapformen.blogspot.in/2012/12/death-trap-anti-men-laws-which-have.html#!/2012/12/death-trap-anti-men-laws-which-have.html

    ReplyDelete
  28. Ghata, it is not contested that a lot of women are undergoing various forms of abuse, and that this figure is higher than that of men. It is also not contested that these victims should get justice. What I’d also like to bring to your attention is that, albeit on a lesser scale, men get abused too – both by the filing of false cases against them as well as economically, physically, sexually, etc, and there is a strong stigma against men speaking out as well. What we are asking for, therefore, is (i) gender-neutral laws (ii) stringent punishment for false laws, and (iii) the removal of monetary bounties without the strong burden of proof. Your earlier comments indicate you agree with some of these, so thank you for seeing this point of view as well.

    False cases are a big problem, because the fear of police harassment is used as leverage for everything ranging from revenge for a failed live-in relationship to making a quick buck to covering up adultery, etc. Clearly, the filing of false cases helps no one – innocent men are traumatized along with their families and genuine women victims lose credibility. Just as the legal system is obliged to punish the guilty, it has a greater duty to ensure the innocent are not persecuted. The second should not be forgotten, just because the numbers of the affected are a minority.

    The huge misuse of 498a IPC is a case in point. It really crushes your soul to find yourself, your parents, and your brother and sister and their spouses in jail arrested for something they did not do, just so the wife wants to live in adultery or wants to make a quick buck, and running around desperately to obtain bail. Children are cut off while the father and his family are running around criminal courts faced with a huge settlement or a long trial. This is what a lot of us have been through.

    Arrest is something that is immediate, BEFORE investigation, and this is a process that continues to this day, and it affects people who never even had any contact with the girl, just because of her verbal statement.

    I, too, feel ashamed that you do not feel safe on the streets in this day and age. But, at the same time, you must realize that it is equally shameful that laws intended to protect women are misused to put innocent people, including women — our mothers and sisters — in jail on false cases. This is our biggest worry. It is great that this protest is happening. The point to keep in mind is when passing new legislation in the necessity of the things I mention above and how it is equally important that those are implemented as well. Mass hysteria has a funny way of making ordinary people condoning and and even participating in evil things. The Holocaust, the Salem Witch Hunt, and closer to the topic at hand, the Scottsboro trial are all examples.

    Also, for the record, I believe stringent punishment is a deterrent, but it is not the only solution, nor does it go to the cause of the problem. It is hypocrisy to protest this incident on one hand and go back home to consume the same item numbers and same trash mainstream media that objectify women and denigrate them as sex objects. I believe it is equally important for us to show we have better taste (if we really do) - pop culture and media are but a reflection of our society’s values. As you seem to be someone who also reviews Bollywood movies, I think the irony is not lost on you.

    To a just India and a better India. For ALL of us.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you and agree to your points. And I never said we should not move towards making gender neutral laws that convict the criminal and not the gender. Instead of pointing fingers at me , why can't we work together to bring in new ideas to implement what we are saying?

      Delete
    2. As you can see from discussions here, too often, the anger at injustice meted out to the respective sexes results in a lot of name calling against the other sex that obscures logic and reason. The acts of a few depraved souls does not make the entire gender bad. Evil is gender-agnostic.

      Thank you for being open-minded enough to see another point of view on how these laws should be structured.

      Delete
    3. Hi Ghata
      I appreciate that you finally agreed that convict the criminal and not the gender.
      Now can I request you to share below document on your FB? The way men are sitting on dharna for Damini, can you also please do your share to save men. I will follow your FB page to see the updates. Thanks.


      https://docs.google.com/file/d/0B_r1rLkxRdL8dHUxd2NmdWNwbms/edit?pli=1



      Delete
  29. Ghata Can you please block these Chauvinistic Pigs from your blog?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am not like them, commenting and reacting without reading. I am letting them be so that all of us can see what kind of a society we live in.

      Delete
    2. Farima, stop crying and better support your arguments with facts like these Chauvinictic Pigs are doing.

      Delete
    3. So Farina...Do you consider other men around you as pigs too? People here are giving you reasons and data and showing how a biased soceity looks like. If you run out of reasons, you block them huh..

      Now you understand how you have created your own grave. Well the consequences of changing legislation will make women more endagered too...here's how -

      http://parthasadhukhan.wordpress.com/2012/12/25/how-delhi-gang-rape-will-change-our-life-in-future/

      Delete
  30. Ghata
    can you block this feminist bitch from this blog?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wish men had some more compassion to give to women in times like these when are truly angered!

      Delete
    2. Hi Ghata
      Why this double standards ?
      I just repeated Farina's statements with gender changed and look you showed your true colors with biased statements?

      Only men should respect women?
      Women just keep couting their rights? LOL !
      you are sick!

      Delete
  31. Guys
    Please have a look at this video and you will realise what men are trying to say.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QCrD6guxYY&feature=related

    ReplyDelete
  32. NYTimes published my comment, on why true cases like Nirbhaya will get delayed justice in a clogged judiciary, and may linger on in courts for decades, unless the 70% consensual sex cases (when both the boy and girl consented and enjoyed), were later converted into false rape cases in the name of Women Empowerment (when relationship gets soured) are weeded out of our already overburdened system, to make way for Nirbhaya.

    This is what NYTimes published:

    Niladri, New Delhi

    Dan, the other unfortunate part is that over 70% rape cases in India are actually false cases. They are not rape but consensual sex (based on love or promise of marriage). When the boy, due to souring of relationship or otherwise, refuses to marry his girlfriend, then the girl files a rape case. In such false rape cases, the boy fearing arrests and other peer pressure sometimes agrees to marry his girlfriend. Women NGOs in India, encourage filing of such false rape cases, as it inflates rape statistics and helps in getting funds from other advanced countries like US, in the name of women empowerment.

    You may find this article of Pune Police Report, stating 74% rape cases are actually consensual sex interesting.

    http://www.punemirror.in/index.aspx?page=article&sectid=2&contentid=201004282010042823514675722129e15&sectxslt=&pageno=2

    http://www.nytimes.com/2012/12/29/world/asia/condition-worsens-for-victim-of-gang-rape-in-india.html?comments&_r=0#permid=25:1

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Buddy, there is a reason why the police report says so--who writes it and why? Do you remember the number of custodial rapes that have happened in this country and rape by sons/relatives of policemen? Which gender wrote it and what process did they use to collect data and analyse it! I will never trust a police report. I want to see independent research reports which also analyzes how the cops cover up their ass by saying it was a case of consensual sex!

      Delete
    2. Good Bhavana...so you will not trust any govt. data and want to see inidependent research. How these researches are done? Some women group taking statements of women and writing the innovative complaints.

      hahaha..understand these are based on national crime stats, after the cases are tried by competent courts. So keep your innovative thoughtsabout victimhood to your self.

      Delete
  33. once you watch the 28 dec episode of Savdhaan India of Life OK channel ... you'll understand that when such a law is misused not only men but also the women of their family bear the brunt... Just like in dowry harassment law, it tries to protect 1 woman, but its misuse actually ends up abusing the rights of 4-5 women ( mother, sister, granny, sister-in-law of the husband) apart from the men of that family... The 16 dec r@pe incident was heinous, and deserves death penalty, but such death penalty should not be "de-facto" punishment - it should only be maximum punishment attracted in rarest of rare cases like this one... which means that current r@pe laws + homicide laws, without amendment also can serve right punishment to the accused....


    the 28 dec episode can be viewed here:
    http://www.desi-tashan.com/youtube/665489-28th-december-2012-savdhaan-india-at-11-crime-alert-part1/

    http://www.desi-tashan.com/youtube/665490-28th-december-2012-savdhaan-india-at-11-crime-alert-part2/

    http://www.desi-tashan.com/youtube/665491-28th-december-2012-savdhaan-india-at-11-crime-alert-part3/

    http://www.desi-tashan.com/youtube/665492-28th-december-2012-savdhaan-india-at-11-crime-alert-part4/


    ReplyDelete
  34. /// What I do know for sure is that if all the men around us pledge to protect us ///

    who has been protecting girls/women till date?
    Right from Ramayana/Mahabharata till date like Ruben case of Mumbai or this case where the girl's male friend received injuries while protecting her??
    There are lumpen elements in soceity, both men and women, -- they were there in Ramayana time also and they will remain till eternity...
    Even after this delhi case who is going to protect women -- the "male" homeguards who'll be put on night shifts of 10pm-6am...
    Men have been protecting women since Ramayana and will continue to do so in future...

    Question is what are women going to do for their men??
    Will the REAL women recommend for castration / capital penalty to complainants of "false rape" cases?
    How many women murderers have received death penalty in India till date after independence??

    ReplyDelete
  35. Hello everybody

    Warning document for indian bachelors has been drafted in Hindi as well.
    Already english document has got covered by media.
    I request you all to share it with your friends and save indian men from such extortionists. Women who files false cases of 498a and rape are like like leeches who can only be thrown away once they have sucked your blood.
    I request everybody to make aware inidan men before they get married with below doc.


    https://docs.google.com/file/d/0B_r1rLkxRdL8dHUxd2NmdWNwbms/edit?pli=1


    I have requested Ghata to share this on her FB page as she seem to agree that men also suffer and she also demand agnder biased society.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Few boys commit suicide on false allegations.

    http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/delhi/Charged-with-molestation-youth-kills-self/articleshow/17836990.cms

    As per NCRB, 62000 married men commit suicide every year in India but that goes un-noticed as women are MORE harassed so only they need protection. Sad !
    Yet again a false FIR claimed 2 lives.
    Well done Ghata, your blogs are really empowering women.

    ReplyDelete
  37. ooohh godd...many men committing suicide due to these feminists bitches who think that they can do anything.

    http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/pune/Software-engineer-commits-suicide/articleshow/17564968.cms

    ReplyDelete
  38. Hi Ghata,
    Few more for you. Seem like you also want to save this abla-nari?

    Faridabad woman killed husband, mom-in-law

    http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/delhi/Faridabad-woman-killed-husband-mom-in-law/articleshow/16959837.cms?intenttarget=no

    FARIDABAD: A woman has been convicted for murdering her mother-in-law and husband for the insurance claim. Nisha (30) was successful in passing off her mother-in-law's murder as an accident, but her father-in-law got suspicious after his son's death.

    Nisha is a resident of Sector-23, Faridabad and worked as an insurance agent in a private company. Greed for a lavish lifestyle and an extra-marital affair prompted Nisha to murder her mother-in-law Angoori Devi on September 13, 2009 with the help of her lover Manish (19) and an accomplice, Shyam Sunder. Police suspected no foulplay in Devi's death.

    Nisha had made a policy of Rs 50 lakh on Devi and had nominated herself as the beneficiary. Her husband, Arvind, came to attend his mother's last rites when she got a policy of Rs 30 lakh made in his name. Arvind was killed on October 10 by Nisha, Manish and their two accomplices, Shyam and Murli. The murder could have passed off as accident but Nisha's father-in-law got suspicious. The case was transferred to crime department and all four, Nisha, Manish, Shyam and Murli, were held.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Hello all, one of my friends referred me to this blog post and I have something to add to this not-so-healthy discussion.

    Wish-something-unfortunate-befalls-you-so-you-get-my-point ?! Misandry ?! Chauvinist pigs ?! Feminist bitches ?! Seriously ??!!! When all that you all want is the poor victim gets justice and the criminals are severely punished ? :|

    I admire the blog owner to let all kinds of comments be here, I think she braves them all quite well.

    Firstly, as Harish Iyer says it, it is people who rape, not just men, not just women.

    Secondly, there are number of crimes happening every second in our country, which we all agree with. I'm amused that someone mentioned few here and asked for a post be put up for them, that would take thousands a day people.

    And I don't think the blog owner is a social activist to be covering every single crime. I believe she could identify with the delhi gangrape victim and felt deeply for her and blogged about it on her personal blog. Just like someone here could identify with the mental trauma faced by a false case.

    How I wish all of you fought for injustice in any way instead of with each other.

    I'll leave with a blog link which has all I want to say.
    http://phoenixritu.com/the-politics-of-raising-my-voice-on-social-networks/

    While I'm at it, here is another link which discusses what really is feminism.
    http://shailsnest.com/2011/03/13/are-you-a-feminist/

    To quote from it, "Feminism is the belief in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes".

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for that profound thought Jazz...I agree with you :)

      Delete
    2. So you said feminism is equality...then why do women need maintance, why are your groups ask for maintance to be a right for them? Why do you need reservation everywhere, or need 50% of husband's property simply on marraige?

      It is because all you want is only your rights but no responsibility

      Delete
    3. I'm sorry but I think you better ask these questions to the women in your life Partha.

      Because atleast I'm not one of the ones you mentioned.

      Delete
    4. I apologize if my previous comment offended you in any way Partha.

      I just visited your blog and I appreciate the stats you have provided and also the awareness you are creating. I agree that the patriarchal society is as much disadvantageous to the men as it is to women.

      But I just felt this was not a proper manner to bring up that issue. There have been countless lives the Delhi gang rape victim has touched and so many of them have expressed their anger and grief in their own way, and this blog post by Ghata is simply one such.

      Delete
  40. Well said. Ghata please note
    "Feminism is the belief in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, but I guess you should direct your comment towards the commenter who used the term 'Feminist bitch' while still saying she is being unfair. Because I don't see Ghata claim she is a feminist anywhere and act otherwise.

      Delete
  41. @Ghata: Good to see that U r not flinching at many peoples' comments here. I saw that some one called u a bitch too. Shell shockedd. Theres no way U can stop these comments/torments which end in targeting U ! This makes me nothing but sad

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know its saddening but isn't it enlightening? To know the levels people can stoop to? Even though I have been very respectful in stating my points at all times.

      Delete
    2. It definitely feels good to see few supporters too ! Let's be hopeful

      Delete
  42. OOOooouuuchhhhh! being a girl, she can call anybody pig, B******* but should not get a similar reply?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh I am sorry! She shouldn't have called such rapist men a pig. The pigs would feel insulted! PETA would love to have you on board!

      Delete
  43. Ghata. I seriously think its a waste of time. India is damned by some useless assholes who will always think that women itself are responsible.
    I even read a post on fb
    http://www.facebook.com/EkAurInqalab/posts/322705027838834

    all m saying is that ppl only blabber about thngs. Jiske sath hota hai, sirf use hi pata chalta hai. People who are saying its grls fault, unki mother ya sisters k sath hoga then you revert to them that it was their fault. then only they will understand. till than, there is no use of making those bunch of fools understand anything coz they wont.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's true! i just made my effort to bring forth some valid points.

      Delete
  44. Ghata, kudos for standing up so well and in such a loving way! Read this article: http://www.independent.co.uk/voices/comment/sexual-violence-is-not-a-cultural-phenomenon-in-india--it-is-endemic-everywhere-8433445.html written by a man who states aptly: "We do know that, after getting on a bus home after watching a film with a friend, she was tortured so badly that she lost her intestines. Six people – including the bus driver – have been arrested; they have been widely denounced as “animals” on social media. It’s always comforting to think – despite everything that the 20th century should have taught us – that those who commit vile acts are sub-human, are not quite like us, so we can create emotional distance from them. But it was thinking, feeling, living human men who committed this rape, however nauseating it is to accept."

    In my own article that I wrote in response to many such comments that there are good men, I pointed out that while there are many good men, I do not know who is who and that everyone is guilty in my court until they prove themselves otherwise. http://tillingtheearthwoman.blogspot.in/2012/12/take-back-india-i-men-we-trust.html

    If 95% DV cases are false, then the guys who are commenting in such a foul mouthed manner should visit burn wards of government hospitals in their cities--just the sight of the women burnt will make them crawl!

    Men in India are terrified--this case has gone into their citadels of power where they could lay claim to pride by blaming it all on women. Kudos to you Ghata for dealing with men who are incapable of listening with such thought and sweetness. I stand by you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much much Bhavana for your kind words and support. I kind of tried to bring out that sentiment too. But some men, alas, didn't seem to think in the same way.

      Delete
  45. Very valid points. All of them make sense.Gender equality is far from truth in this shamed country. It is so threatening to know that people with such attitudes exist among us.

    You're not alone, Ghata. The whole of womenkind stands by you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What you are saying is true.
      But thank you so much Akanksha for your support. It means a lot in such a hostile environment.

      Delete
  46. Valid points for sure.

    And yes you are not alone. Not only the whole of womankind stands by you but also the MANkind that comprises of true men.

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  47. To all the men, women, genuines and trolls who are stating cases where women have committed crimes or taken advantage of the law, Yes, there are women who take advantage of laws. There are women who commit crimes too. Shame on those women. We dont condemn them. We despise them too. But with all due respect, just because they are wrong doesn't make these rapist men right. I don't understand your logic.

    The issue here is about the men who are raping, the mentality leading them to rape and the men and women protesting against them. The issue is about a large majority of men standing by when they see a women being hassled. The issue is about a rising number of men wanting to prove their manhood not by standing up for someone but by controlling and showing their power over the weak and powerless. The issue is when a whole gender is being blamed and ridiculed and in the global public eye because of such men. I would think that all this would actually cause more men to stand up against such perverts instead of going tangent, turning around and pointing the fingers back at somebody else?

    What is the point of bringing in another topic here? Why dont you start a different thread on your blog for that one? With all due respect blaming someone else for a different crime doesn't make these men (both rapists and innocent bystanders) innocent now, does it?

    ReplyDelete
  48. Yes, there are women who take advantage of laws. There are women who commit crimes too. Shame on those women. We dont condemn them. We despise them too.
    >> But there are no law that can convict a women for domestic violence, adultery, >> sexual harassment, rape etc. and that is what we are demanding and requesting govt. >> to make gender neutral laws.
    But with all due respect, just because they are wrong doesn't make these rapist men right. I don't understand your logic.
    >> Very well said. Just because those 6 men raped an innocent girl, Ghata (blog >>writer) was calling all men criminals starting this debate so better teach her >>first. Agreed about your all other points. I appreciate you gender neutral views.
    Why dont you start a different thread on your blog for that one?
    >> Several blogs are there but you can have a look on mine.

    http://misuseof498aanddv.blogspot.in/2012/12/misuse-of-dv498a-myth-or-reality.html

    http://sffdelhitrainingsessions.blogspot.in/2012/12/AREyouMALE.html

    http://endangeredmen.blogspot.in/

    http://standingagainstfeminism.blogspot.in/2012/12/recently-some-of-my-freinds-were.html

    >> I would like to see your comments there. Regards

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. With all due respect, if it had been only 6 men in a population of 1.2 billion, it would have been easier to convict. But you and I both know its not. This incident was only the tipping point. And it hasn't made a dent either. This is Ghata's personal blog, and she has a right to believe and post based on her perception and experiences. Just because I am believe there are crimes against men too, doesn't mean I am saying crimes against women are less. Statistically there are exponentially more. We all have our personal experiences. As far as generalizing it, its not her perception alone. Its sad but true that the perception of Indian men is changing at a global level too. Read some articles from the UK, US, Australian press if you want. Indian men in paris reporting heckling by foreigners because of other mens' actions in India. If tomorrow the number of crimes against men reach such an extent then women will probably face the same treatment too. Its a common natural thing to happen. If there were 1 or 2 incidents then those could be outliers or exceptions. Knowing that 100s of incidents happen on a daily basis is horrifying - and that it has become a norm is way more tragic.

      If a few fanatic men with their extremist views and activities could cause all men and women of a religion to get a bad name, then why are you surprised if this is happening? A friend of mine had articulated this thought well. "A group of people are sometimes identified by the extreme characters in them... because these traits stand out and are more visible. This is not necessarily an indication of the ideology / behavior of the group as a whole... but people generalize and that is what she meant that if a religion as a group of people can have its reputation tainted by fanatics, then it isn't surprising that the male gender as a whole takes a beating because of some scum mixed within the gender group. It all comes down to who you can trust... when you pick one apple from a basket, bite into it to find a worm... you are wary of the rest of the apples in the basket... healthy or not."

      I am sure you have many readers and honest genuine supporters on your blog too. I am not here in the form of a social activist to jump from one cause to another. All I am saying is, let's not belittle one issue by raking up another issue. They belong in totally different forums. This post is about crime against women and the rising numbers of men who are committing these crimes or letting those happen. We feel strongly about causes and hence we post or comment about those. We can debate all we want - but this is not a battle of the sexes. But with the rising numbers within a population, if this is the way it continues, generalization is bound to happen.

      With this I rest my case. Anything else I say would be like bashing my head against a wall.

      Delete
    2. You have summarized it all so beautifully Deepa. Thanks for your presence and words..

      Delete
    3. @Deepa : feels good to see ur reply !yep like u said any thing else u talk will be banging ur head not on a wall but on a wrought iron gate. Anything I say or Ghata says to ExPLAIN as to why she blogged will be banging the head and here men were requested by some body to avoid WOMEN like me and Ghata. LOL!!

      Ghata and I would be relieved if who ever saw the notice issued in the comments avoids us. What say Ghata ?

      Delete
  49. Well Ghata..since you have mentioned me multiple times I had to respond. Understand one thing, none of us protesting against this hype is anti woman. We have seen too much misuse of these women freindly laws. The real statisics show how these laws (including rape) is misused. How men get punishment for no offences being done by them. If justice is denied to men like this then tomorrow men will simply kill women. You have seen how men in the soceity have come forward in support of women this time. But I have never seen any woman coming forward in support of men when they suffer. No women's groups ever protested slaughtering of men and their families by other women.and demanded their punishment.

    I am sure if the incident has happened with a man no woman would have bothered to come forward with candle light march or demand strict punishment for the offenders. You have demanded protecting women around us that all of us did for all these years, only to see that still we are termed as criminals under different domestic laws. Some of us were brother or related to a groom who got married.

    Now what people like you have done is created so much of bias in the soceity that now every other man is vulnerable to false complaints for no fault of theirs. And women have become so costly that men in future will stop looking at them as their partners, rather look at them as precious and untouchable godess who is good from a distant. Because she will burn the men around her even for no fault of his. Don't be surprised to see marraige rates coming down or women being ignored in different forums.

    I am sure you will still have many protectors around you and many will be ready to die for you, without realizing that they will be used as tissue paper and tomorrow they may be behind the bars for doing nothing. Well spare me and some of us who refuse to be slaves...the day is coming when women will also need women as partners, average women will never get an alliance and some extraordinary women will get killed for ditching men and using them as tissue paper. Remember, you will be responsible for that day...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't understand this need of guys like you, who are constantly harassing us to raise our voices for you. What's wrong with you?
      I will raise my voice against what I think is wrong. And TA DA! If you don't know better, you can do the same. Simple, no?

      Or you chauvinistic guys don't know how to do a thing without a woman's help?

      If something's bothering you, please feel free to raise your voice. I am not stopping you. This is my blog, and I will say and write what I feel. I hope I have made myself clear.

      Delete
    2. Your comments made it clear...you do not want your thoughts to be challenged as you do not have any justification for the same. Since you support what you feel like..we also support what we feel like. SO what is your problem.

      Also who needs more support? Is it men? I think it is other way round and all men support women unconditionally and create their own death trap. Women like you never stop crying victimhood even when all facilities and empowerment given to you.

      All men will die for you but women like you will never be empowered..

      Delete
    3. Ya...we can see the "unconditional support" of "all men" in and out of the country. Please rest easy in your own victimized world.

      Delete
    4. Ghata O dear Ghata,
      you are a true lady with an obvious IQ :-)
      I can't stop laughing on your comment below when your blog itself seem to be requesting other gender for helping women. Lolmost !!!!!!!!!!!!!


      >>Or you chauvinistic guys don't know how to do a thing without a woman's help?

      Delete
  50. 17-year-old boy raped at knife-point by 10 women


    http://news.in.msn.com/crimefile/article.aspx?cp-documentid=4611178


    ReplyDelete
  51. "Cash Reward for women telling LIES is women EMPOWERMENT......Govt of India"

    "Marriage is Domestic Violence on Men"

    “The current system turns a father into a visitor and a paycheck.”

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How I wish the fathers did not get turned by the system and realize their role like this awesome person.

      http://weourlife.wordpress.com/2013/01/05/day5-bringing-up-your-kids-who-is-responsible/

      Delete

  52. MRA says proposed changes to rape laws are extreme; could be used to blackmail, harass men

    http://epaper.timesofindia.com/Repository/ml.asp?Ref=UE1JUi8yMDEzLzAxLzA3I0FyMDAyMDA%3D

    Even as women’s organisations demand no-holds barred punishment for rapists, men are coming out with their own take on the issue. Pune-based group Men’s Right Association (MRA) has sent a list of suggestions to the three-member committeeheadedbyformerChiefJusticeofIndiaJ S Verma has been set up to amend laws in sexual assault cases.

    The MRA claims that certain provisions in the proposed laws are extreme and could lead to the law being grossly misused. Atit Rajpara, founder-president, MRA, said, “The Central governmentandwomen’sgroupsplantoamend rape laws which we support. We want the death penalty for rapists, even if it isn’t a case of rape and murder. However, some of the proposals are extreme and can be used to harass men.”

    Rajpara added, “All references to ‘man’ or ‘woman’ must be replaced with ‘person’ or ‘whosoever’ ‘Husband and ‘wife’ must be replaced with ‘spouse’. We alsowantthatrelationshipormaritaldisputes should not be included in a sexual assault case as they are covered under the Domestic Violence Act.”

    “Most importantly, we would like the commitee to recommend that rape laws be made gender neutral, so a rape accused is punished regardless of gender, caste or religion. However, the government and women’s groups are not ready to do this,” he said.

    TheMRAsentintheirlistonJanuary2 and have also started a mass email campaign to spread awareness.

    GOVT, WOMEN'S GROUPS PROPOSE

    » Punishment for rape accused should be hanging till death, presently the death penalty stands only for rape and murder

    » Chemical castration for accused

    » Accused must prove that he has not committed the rape, the victim does not need to give any proof or even a medical test. The victim only has to claim that she has been raped and whoever she nameds will be arrested immediately and not get bail till the case is over, irrespective of how long it goes on » As soon as the victim files the case, regardless of whether it is true or false, she will get a minimum of Rs 2 lakh with a first instalment of Rs 50,000 available immediately

    » A rape victim will get a government job

    » In a marital dispute, the wife can file a rape charge on her husband along with Section 498A of the Indian Penal Code (Husband or relative of husband of a woman subjecting her to cruelty) and the husband will have no defence.

    » There should be no punishment for women making false rape or gang rape charges.

    MRA RECOMMENDS

    » Rape laws should not be misused as the Domestic Violence Act often is. The law should not become a means of blackmail and extortion » Rape laws should be made gender neutral

    » Cases of infidelity in a relationship should not be converted into rape cases

    » False complaints of rape should be punished severely, so that genuine cases like Jyoti Singh Pandey get justice.

    » Introduce police and judicial reforms for speedier justice and to increase conviction rates in rape cases

    » Men should allowed to file rape cases

    » There are several cases where the woman consents to a sexual relationship, but later changes her mind, saying she was drunk, under threat or that the man promised to marry her or promised her a job. Such cases should not be termed as rape

    ReplyDelete
  53. निशा शर्मा के खिलाफ दहेज उत्पीड़न का केस

    http://navbharattimes.indiatimes.com/dowry-case-against-nisha-sharma/articleshow/17958708.cms

    दहेज के खिलाफ आवाज उठाकर और बरात लौटाकर निशा शर्मा ने 10 साल पहले सुर्खियां बटोरी थीं। अब वही दहेज के केस में फंस गई है। उनकी भाभी मनीषा के परिजनों ने पानीपत के समालखा थाने में उसके समेत परिजनों के खिलाफ दहेज उत्पीड़न समेत अनेक धाराओं में एफआईआर दर्ज करवाई है। इस मामले मंे निशा के भाई को पुलिस ने रेड डालकर 8 जनवरी को गिरफ्तार भी कर लिया है।

    मनीषा के पिता विजय शर्मा की ओर से दर्ज करवाई गई एफआईआर के अनुसार, उन्होंने करीब 3 साल पहले अपनी बेटी की शादी सेक्टर-61 निवासी ज्ञानेश्वर शर्मा से की थी। इस शादी से उन्हें एक बच्चा भी हुआ। एफआईआर के मुताबिक, मनीषा के ससुर डी. डी. शर्मा, सास हेमलता शर्मा, पति ज्ञानेश्वर शर्मा और ननद निशा शर्मा ने 12 लाख रुपये दहेज मांगा और न ला पाने पर उसके साथ मारपीट शुरू कर दी। कई बार उन्होंने उन्हें समझाने की कोशिश भी की लेकिन उन पर कोई असर नहीं हुआ। आरोप है कि पिछले साल ठंड मंे उन्होंने स्वेटर उतरवाकर मनीषा से कई बार पूरे घर में पोंछा लगवाया और मना करने पर मारपीट की।

    एफआईआर में कहा गया है कि पिछले साल मामला यहां तक बढ़ा कि मनीषा के ससुरालियों ने उसे घर से निकाल दिया। इसके बाद से वह समालखा में रहने को मजबूर हैं। अब वे मनीषा को जबरन तलाक देकर अपने बेटे ज्ञानेश्वर की दूसरी शादी कराने की योजना बना रहे हैं। इस मामले में उनकी तहरीर पर पुलिस ने निशा शर्मा समेत चारों ससुरालियों के खिलाफ धारा 498ए (स्त्री के साथ ससुरालियों द्वारा क्रूरता करना), 506 (जान से मारने की धमकी देना), 504 (गालीगलौज करना), 406 (शादी में दिए सामानों पर कब्जा करना) के आरोप में नामजद मुकदमा दर्ज कर लिया है। मुकदमे के बाद समालखा पुलिस ने 8 जनवरी को नोएडा में रेड डालकर मनीषा के पति ज्ञानेश्वर शर्मा को अरेस्ट कर लिया। उनके ससुर डी. डी. शर्मा, सास हेमलता शर्मा और ननद निशा शर्मा को फरार बताया जा रहा है। पुलिस उनकी गिरफ्तारी का प्रयास कर रही है।

    ReplyDelete
  54. Nisha Sharma.....tasting her own spit.....what an irony.....epic case of mis-use of gender biased laws :-)....tit for tat.

    kyonki saaas bhi kabhi bahu thi.

    100 main se 99 be-imaan, hamare desh main biwiyaan pahalwaan :-)

    ReplyDelete
  55. I believe, new laws if made, will be implemented only the statement of a woman is proved. Why are you guys fighting over it? Everything in the current case was clear from day 1. Still nothing from Indian law? Its shameful that instead of supporting the cause, you guys are keen of finding the opposite side on the basis of a few cases.

    ReplyDelete

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