Friday, February 14, 2014

Of Motherhood and Friendships !!

When I got pregnant last year, I thought about a lot of things that would change in my life. Like going out for a vacation or movie or dinner at our whim. Anytime, any place. Like reading and re-reading my favorite books late into the night. Like talking to H over a cup of steaming ginger tea late into the night. About my girl friends, or petty office politics, or the world hunger problems. I was prepared for these and how. Now vacations have to be pre planned and detailed to the T to make sure everything is baby friendly. Even a trip to the mall is like securing stuff for a rough night. Diapers, change of dress, milk yada yada. Books are a forgotten luxury. Oh boy! I miss them so so much. And as for H and I, there's hardly any talk, forget world hunger. The little that we get to talk is, of course, about the baby. You know, baby's milk, baby's poo. So there.

But one thing that I hadn't figured was that even friendships changed. Or to put it more correctly, friends change. Even if they are "happy" about your "good news", in reality, they are just mentally checking you off from the party list. You find that weird, because you, at heart, are still the outgoing fun kinda girl. And when the baby arrives, you'd think they would be there to hold your hand and walk you through this difficult stage in your life. But holy cow. That's a good morning message for you. In the name of giving you space to figure things out, they almost leave a gaping hole where once they were. Probably they can't stand the "cutesy baby stuff". But hey!! Wasn't that what friendship was all about? In sickness and in health? In love and out of love? Or am I from an era bygone?

By the way, talking of relationships and (lost) love, happy Valentine's day people. It's late, but you see, I have just had a baby. Hope you can keep with that, or won't you?


12 comments:

  1. Iyoo...kaun Sasur ki naathin hai yeh? Why would anyone have a problem inviting you over? especially when they can gobble up the most adorable cheeks on the block.

    Strange some people are is all I can say right now :(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Absolutely right cracking. They don't know what they are missing. :-D

      Delete
  2. All I can say is Ghata enjoy ur motherhood to tge fullest....This time is nvr gonna cum bk. ..n yeah friendship suffers but sooner or later it has an END AS IT'S LAST 3 LETTERS SAY.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's true. And for the matter, I am enjoying my motherhood to the T. Thanks for dropping by. And it would be good to see the real you :-)

      Delete
  3. Oh, yes that happens. Sometimes not even deliberately. I remember feeling left out as I was among the first ones in my friend circle to have a baby. Most people don't then know how to behave around you. Hang in there, Ghata!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bang on Rachna. I am among the first ones to have a baby too. But you know what, now that I know this feeling, I will make sure I don't do that to my friends

      Delete
  4. If I could get to hold that lovely princess for a while, I would throw a huge party for you. She is just soooo adorable. Something changed after motherhood in my life, but it seems like something opposite of what you are talking about. My husband accused me of ignoring him, my family accused me of not being involved in anything they did, and my friends accused me of not responding. The trend continues even after 22 years. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aww...thnku for your kind words Farida ji :-)
      I know what you are saying. Why can't people just be right? Too much to ask?

      Delete
  5. I totally connect with u..nit only friendship..pple keep u out of all fun activities as there is a baby. .but husbands dont suffer...y???

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are so right anonymous. And that's a different debate altogether.
      Would be good to know the real you.

      Delete
  6. Don't worry, be happy! But glad you are blogging!!!!!!!!!!!!! See, some good came of it :D Hang in there kiddo. All will be well, soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes.....and thank you for all the support Vini :-)

      Delete

I love to hear back from you :)