Monday, March 31, 2014

A for advice


Today I start the A-Z blogging challenge 2014 which means I'll be blogging this entire month,  except the Sundays. I know it's going to take a whole lot of will power to keep up the pace. But it also means that I'll be spamming your inboxes much more. So there. You have been warned:-)

Let's face it. We all have bee there, done that. Been on both ends of the spectrum when it comes to unsolicited advice. While giving it lies in our genes amd we can give out as much, and anytime. But taking it is another ballgame altogether.

Pregnancy and new motherhood are invitations for a lot of advice. Anyone and everyone you know or you don't will have a tip or two for you. While all of it is definitely given in good spirit, it does get to you sometimes.

Even your closest friends fall prey to this syndrome. You would call them or text them to rant about a problem, and lo and behold, they are busy extending out their set of wisdom.
Since I have recently been through all of the above situations, I can tell you, sometimes you just want to pull your hair out and shout out the choicest abuses. Ha! If only you didn't want to be written off a lunatic.

So here is my quick advice survival guide:

1) Take all of it with a smile, but use only what you deem beneficial to you and your child. Motherly instincts are way better than experience or doctors.

2) Give advice, only when asked for it. This would make life so much simpler...isn't it? 😆

3) Be a good listener. Most of the people/friends who call you to rant about their issues are only looking to let it out of their system. And as much as we like to think we are helping the fella at the other end, in reality, we all have to face our life's demons ourselves. No one can take the difficult decisions for you. So just listen, nod, agree, and if need be, join your friend in abusing his/her problem. Letting go of anger is a very crucial first step to finding solution to any problem.

4) Most importantly, always be there for your friends. No matter what. Meet them, text, email, watsapp whatever it takes. And repeat step 3 ☺

5) The above post is an advice. Take a deep breath, go to step 1 and repeat 😁

28 comments:

  1. Sometimes I find that jut pretending to listen but mentally thinking of other things also helps!! :P Just saying! :D

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    1. Ha ha,...that's some good advice Gosh

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  2. Phew! Am past that stage..and in a stage where I give advice...must be careful. Nice post.

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    1. Coming from you... It'd be most welcome Janaki :-)

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  3. I like #1 a lot. It completely makes sense to me. An aunt once said, when dealing with doctors, don't abandon your own common sense. You know your child best. :)

    Dagny

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    1. Thanks ma'm for your kind words.

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  4. I am going to re-read this when I speak to you next :D

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    1. Ha ha...i Know what you are talking about ;-)

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  5. For sure no advice now ;) :P I would say Enjoy the challenge- It is an experience worth the pain ;D err did it sound like advice? I like the no 2 of all
    All the best!

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    1. He he...thanks Afshan...and wish you the same :-)

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  6. Ghats, I know all this 100% directs to me and I promise to be for you what you want me to be. I agree with #1 and #4. But I also think you are touching a very deep aspect of human psyche. Perhaps, people who give advice also love to receive it and see nothing wrong with it. So while "Give advice, only when asked for it. This would make life so much simpler…isn't it?" makes sense practically, that's not the most natural thing for some people towards their loved ones. Being a parent, you may realize that about yourself some day or may be not. But you'd at least see many other parents around pushing their ideas or opinions onto their kids.

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    1. It's not for you, all of it. Although I would give u no. 3.. :-)
      And as far as pushing our opinions on kids is concerned, I think to each his own. It might not be right, but it must be the best thing according to the parent. Who am I to interfere?

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    2. Haha ok. I'd even keep #2 for people who don't matter to me. But babes, I was comparing the "parents want the right thing for their kids" to "anyone wants right things for their loved ones". Its that want, that love that partly brings in so-called unsolicited advice. Why not just ignore if you want to? Why take it so offensively and make the people who love you think before they say something to you? That's an expectation one could have from strangers, perhaps.

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    3. I understand your point. But sometimes the loved ones are precisely the ones who need to cut us some slack ;-) ideally, of course, I should be open to it.

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  7. Everyone needs a piece of it!!

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    1. Yes. And no. :-) see what I mean? ;-)

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  8. I think point no. two is very very important in every aspect of life. Wonderful points to remember :)

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    1. Thanks rajlakshmi....c u around :-)

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  9. Good luck with the challenge, I'm taking it up for the third year this time :)
    http://effervescencia.blogspot.in/2014/04/a-is-for-archaism.html

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    1. Third time? You must be a pro at it by now. All the best anyway :-)

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  10. Listening is such an important skill to have and to develop. I'm still working on it. :)

    Madeline @ The Shellshank Redemption
    Minion, Capt. Alex's Ninja Minion Army
    The 2014 Blogging from A-Z Challenge

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    1. So true Madeline. I think we all need to work at it. Thanks for dropping by and good luck for the challenge

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  12. We might these inspiring posts throughout the challenge. Good work, Ghata.

    Neelam @ http://mechameli.blogspot.in/2014/04/a-list-of-summer-indian-spices.html

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  13. Ghata, firstly, take a bow for taking up this challenge with a lil princess to cater to. I know unasked for advices are so frustrating. Most of the times, all we women need is a listening system.

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  14. That's certainly good advice you have penned. I have written one on the topic, but it is a totally irreverent one ;)

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  15. Well hats off to you for taking up this challenge despite being a new mom! Really!! From the bottom of my heart. I am 7+ months old's mom and an infant blogger facing teething issues still - not haven't been able to complete many posts lying unfinished in my drafts. So good going! Nice posts.

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I love to hear back from you :)